By Tom Robbins

A Children's e-book approximately Beer?

Yes, think it or not—but B Is for Beer is usually a publication for adults, and consider that it's the paintings of maverick bestselling novelist Tom Robbins, inter-nationally identified for his skill to either heavily remove darkness from and comically entertain.

Once upon a time (right approximately now) there has been a planet (how approximately this one?) whose population fed on thirty-six billion gallons of beer every year (it's a truth, you could Google it). between these affected, every one in his or her personal manner, by way of all of the bubbles, burps, and foam, was once a sensible, wide-eyed, adventurous kindergartner named Gracie; her distracted mommy; her insensitive dad; her non-conformist uncle; and a paranormal, butt-kicking intruder from an international inside of our global.

Populated by means of the aforementioned characters—and as fascinating because it should be subversive—B Is for Beer contains readers, old and young, in a shocking, far-reaching research into the bounds of truth, the transformative powers of kids, and, after all, the final word that means of a tall, chilly brewski.

Show description

Read or Download B Is For Beer PDF

Best children's literature books

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (Barnes & Noble Classics Series)

Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tin Woodman, the Cowardly Lion—they’re now as cherished part of American folklore as Johnny Appleseed and Paul Bunyan. considering its first e-book in 1900, L. Frank Baum’s tale of a bit woman over excited by means of a twister to the unusual and gorgeous Land of oz. has had a unprecedented emotional effect on wide-eyed readers old and young.

The Witches

Meet a hero, a smart outdated grandmother, and the main ugly, ugly gang of witches imaginable!

This Roald Dahl vintage tells the feared, humorous and innovative story of a seven-year-old boy who has a run-in with a few real-life witches! "In fairy stories witches constantly put on foolish black hats and black cloaks they usually journey on broomsticks. yet this isn't a fairy story. this can be approximately actual WITCHES. actual WITCHES gown in traditional outfits and glance greatly like usual girls. They stay in traditional homes and so they paintings in traditional jobs. this is why they're so demanding to seize. " Witches, as our hero learns, hate youngsters.

With assistance from a pal and his somewhat-magical grandmother, our hero attempts to reveal the witches sooner than they eliminate him.

Illustrated via Quentin Blake.

A Chihuahua in Every Stocking (Barking Detective Mysteries Series, Book 4)

Circulate over, Rudolph -- allow Pepe lead the way!

Who could thieve a bit girl's puppy, correct ahead of Christmas? After seeing younger Sophie's heartbreaking tale at the information, P. I. Geri Sullivan and Pepe--her speaking Chihuahua--vow to rescue this bonita dogs named Chiquita. yet monitoring the pooch's odor via a Pacific Northwest wintry weather wonderland isn't effortless, particularly whilst the path results in an elf who's been mortally mauled! Geri and Pepe needs to keep little Sophie's Christmas and locate this muy naughty dognapper . . . and fan the flames of a bit Christmas magic alongside the way!

Praise for the Barking Detective Mysteries

"Pepe is a satisfaction! " --RT e-book experiences (4 stars)

"Move over, Scooby-Doo, there's a brand new puppy on the town! " --Jennie Bentley

"A enjoyable twist at the common P. I. partnership. " --Simon Wood

15,500 phrases

Thomas and the Rumors (Thomas & Friends)

There's a rumor out that Sir Topham Hatt goes to do away with the trains! James learns a lesson approximately bragging, and Percy saves the day while there's a marriage ceremony at the Island of Sodor. This endearing selection of Thomas the Tank Engine tales is illustrated with pictures from the loved television exhibit.

Extra info for B Is For Beer

Sample text

A trip? Where? How? My mommy…” “Don’t worry. We ’re going far away, but we ’ll be back before you know it. Here. ” Ever obedient, Gracie grasped the wand between her thumb and index finger, but it wasn’t easy to hold on to, it being not much bigger than a tadpole ’s tail. Nevertheless, she felt herself being pulled upright from the bed. Whoa! Easy now! With increasing speed, her body was rising toward the ceiling. ” shouted the Beer Fairy—and from the yippee and wahoo exuberance in her voice, anybody could tell it was one of the Beer Fairy’s favorite sayings.

In the kitchen, she was turning in circles, like a dog looking for a soft place to lie down. Her tummy felt like a washer set on Spin Dry. Her heart felt like a balloon from which the air was leaking. Her brain felt like her gums feel after a visit to the dentist. She was too hurt to stamp her feet or throw things, too angry to weep. She knew she had to do something, though, or else she would just curl up in a knot and die. Eventually, she found herself standing at the refrigerator. Yanking open the door, Gracie suddenly was face to face with a beverage shelf fully stocked with Pepsi cola and beer.

At first, it looked to be a dragonfly, standing on its hind legs, if dragonflies can be said to have hind legs, but it was pacing to and fro and anybody who’s paid attention knows that dragonflies can’t walk. Furthermore, it was tapping steadily, purposefully, on Gracie ’s breastbone with a front leg—or something resembling a leg—as if to get her attention. The thing was only slightly taller than a birthday candle, and had translucent wings that shimmered like moonlight on a barrel of rainwater. ” Obviously, she wasn’t expecting an answer.

Download PDF sample

Rated 4.35 of 5 – based on 36 votes